"I think it might be dementia..."
Memory lapses are becoming more frequent. They're repeating the same stories. Missing appointments. Getting confused about things they used to handle easily. You're pretty sure this isn't just normal aging - but the moment you suggest seeing a doctor, they get defensive, dismissive, or shut down completely.
You're watching someone you love slip away in slow motion, and they won't let you help. You don't know if you're seeing early dementia, depression, medication side effects, or something else entirely. And you're terrified that by the time they agree to get tested, it'll be too late to do anything about it.
This is for you if:
- You're noticing changes that feel like more than just "getting older"
- Every attempt to discuss assessment is met with resistance or anger
- You're carrying this worry alone because they won't acknowledge it
- You need help navigating their fear, denial, or pride without damaging the relationship
What you'll get: Help distinguishing normal ageing from actual cognitive decline - so you're not catastrophising or minimising. Strategies for working through their resistance by understanding what's driving it (usually fear). Ways to frame medical assessment that feel less threatening and more collaborative. Guidance on documenting examples for the GP conversation. Support for the emotional weight of watching this happen while feeling powerless to stop it.
Watching cognitive decline is heartbreaking, and their resistance makes it harder. Let's figure out how to get an assessment without making them feel like you're taking over.
Articles in this journey
I think it might be dementia: What you're seeing and why it matters
You've been watching. Noticing. Probably for months. Your parent asks the same question three times in one conversation. They got confused about what day it was. They couldn't remember where they parked at the shopping centre - a place they've been going to for twenty years. Each time, you explain it away. They're tired. They've been stressed. Everyone forgets things sometimes. But the pattern is becoming harder to ignore. And the word you've been avoiding is starting to surface: dementia. Here's what you need to know: thinking it might be dementia doesn't mean you're catastrophising or being disloyal. It means you're paying attention. This article helps you understand what you're actually seeing, why early assessment matters (even though it's scary), and what dementia actually means in the early stages - which is very different from the worst-case scenarios playing in your head.
The dementia paradox: Why the hardest conversations need to happen early
Here's the paradox that makes dementia uniquely difficult. Dementia patients often want to focus on living in the present. To avoid thinking about decline. To take things one day at a time. And families, wanting to respect that dignity, often wait. But dementia doesn't wait. The window for capturing your parent's authentic wishes about care, medical interventions, living arrangements, what constitutes acceptable quality of life - narrows steadily. By the time a crisis hits (fall, hospitalisation, safety incident), they may no longer be able to tell you what they want. This leaves families making life-altering choices for someone who can no longer express their wishes, guessing between what the person said before diagnosis versus what seems right now. This article addresses why these conversations feel impossible, why they matter anyway, and how to actually have them in a way that preserves dignity while protecting everyone's future.
What are the important documents, information and key contacts to consider?
Navigating the last stage of life involves not only emotional preparation but also practical arrangements. Taking some simple steps can bring comfort and peace of mind to everyone involved. Here's a look at the essential documents and contacts to gather.
Types of care: A simple guide (before you need it at 2am)
A clear guide to care options for ageing parents - from basic home support to full-time care. Understand what's available and what might work for your situation.
Honouring their voice: Communication and dignity through dementia
Here's what most families fear about dementia: That the person they love will disappear. That meaningful connection will become impossible. That their parent will become someone unrecognisable. Here's what research and lived experience actually show: People living with dementia retain their core sense of self, their emotional capacity, and their desire for purpose and connection far longer - and more deeply - than most families expect. The person is still there. But the way they communicate, the way they experience the world, and the way they need you to interact with them changes. If you can adapt how you communicate and relate, you can preserve dignity, autonomy, and meaningful connection through every stage. This article draws on international dementia care research to show you how to honour your parent's voice, even as their ability to express it changes.
You're not just tired. This is what burnout actually feels like.
Caregiver burnout hits hardest after a crisis. Recognise the warning signs and access free support through Carer Gateway before you crash completely.
The siblings who disappeared all year suddenly have opinions about Mum's care
When a crisis hits, distant siblings often emerge with strong opinions but little context. How to manage family conflict when decisions need to happen fast.
Remember when you had a village to raise your kids? Your parents need one too.
You knew how to build a support network when your kids were young—other parents, neighbours, friends who helped each other without keeping score. Your parent needs that same village now. This article shows you how to create a people-first safety net using the skills you already have: being specific about what helps, making it reciprocal, and knowing you can't do this alone. Whether your parent is at home, in independent living, or residential care, the principle is the same - build the network before you desperately need it. And when you do, you'll probably end up helping someone else's parent too. That's how villages work.
"Safety measures that don't scream 'I don't trust you anymore'"
Practical ways to keep your parent safe at home - without being patronising. Technology, check-ins, and solutions that respect independence while giving everyone peace of mind.